Mackenzie and I at Brookie's Wedding
My sister's wedding was beautiful, she looked absolutely amazing!
So a couple of days before her wedding both my sisters and I were sitting around the kitchen table for our morning coffee... I had brought up a devotional and we were reading specifically about marriage (I know my die hard readers are shocked about this)... anyway, we were reading in Genesis 2. Genesis 2:24 talks about a man leaving his mother and father and cleaving to his wife.
Before I go any further I have to give some background... my sisters both love to cook and most everything revolves around being in the kitchen... So when we were discussing the bible verse both of them looked at me and made this chopping gesture, I asked what it meant and they said "like meat cleaver". So we discussed the meaning of cleaving. Merriam Webster defines cleave "to adhere firmly and closely or loyally and unwaveringly" We all shared a laugh in this, their first impression of the word cleave and it was so fun sharing with them the true meaning of the word and how God intended for our marriages to be.
So you can only imagine what happened when the pastor read the exact verse during the ceremony and talked about cleaving. All three of us had to contain ourselves from bursting out with laughter and making a chopping gesture. Just a funny moment and sweet memory made.
I loved that I was able to share in this experience, although not easy. Seeing her wed the love of her life and watching them together, it stirred up a lot of emotions. I just miss Adam so very much and there are so many times, I wish for one whole day of him knowing me, remembering that he loves me. The physical pain I feel everyday from missing him is the worst pain I have ever experienced. My heart longs and yearns for my man, my companion, our dreams we shared, a sense of normalcy, for him to know that he loves me and the significance of our love. I have to believe there will be day that he will be restored. I will never stop trusting in the Lord for Adam's FULL restoration.
With all my heart I will continue to believe that Adam will be restored and I will continue to battle the enemy against the unbelief that creeps in. I'm sharing this purely out of being transparent, sharing my heart, all my heart. This is not discouragement, just my heart crying out for how much I miss my husband, my best friend... my man.